...the secret sketches which lies deep within... (nithanchovy) wrote,
...the secret sketches which lies deep within...

  • Mood:


Title: Regret
Pairing: HaeHyuk
Author: nithanchovy
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance/Drama/Angst/slight!Fluff
Length: oneshot
Word counts : 3,333

Summary: Hyukjae was confused, he love his husband, Donghae, but he love Kim Kibum, his first crush in college, they recalled the old days and Hyukjae started to betray Donghae's love, but how will it turns out when Donghae know about his affairs?

' ' was thought " " was dialogue

Hyukjae was laughing happily in the garden with a certain person that Donghae hate the most, Kim Kibum. Kim Kibum was Hyukjae first crush in college while Donghae is Hyukjae's Husband. Donghae was feeling suspicious with them both, so he decided to spy on them. And now, Donghae was in the car, seeing them sitting in the garden bench through the car window.

Kibum chit-chatting with Hyukjae while petting Hyukjae's pet, choco. Donghae's eyes filled with anger, and his anger reaching it's peak when Kibum carressed Hyukjae's cheek and he saw his wife lowered his head, Donghae could bet that Hyukjae's cheek are flushed. Donghae punch the stir-wheel in frustration and went straight home. His wife, his wife that he love, cheats. He felt extremely disappointed.

Donghae was not an easy person to fall in love. He's been wandering through his life, dating random person and stuff, and he still never fall in love. At the end, he didn't know why, but he fall in love with Lee Hyukjae, his current wife now, they are a lovey-dovey couple and people love seeing their relationship. To be exact, they are envious due to the sweetness. And now, he has already married with his wife for 5 years.

5 years of marriage, of course there's fight, a big one or the small one, but despite that, they are still loving each other, until approximately six months ago, Donghae saw a new message on Hyukjae's phone and opened it while his wife was taking a bath. It's breaking his heart, it said.

From; Kim kibum

When will we meet again? Love you dear monkey, let's have a date.

Donghae still keeps his calm and still think that maybe it's only his assumption, Hyukjae won't cheat on him. Hyukjae love him so much. Donghae thought naively.

As time goes by, Donghae found out that Hyukjae often smile when he opened a message in his phone. Donghae frowns, and he decided to opened Hyukjae's phone when he slept. Donghae opened it and soon regret it, it full of Kim Kibum. Donghae know Kim Kibum is Hyukjae's first crush. But it's getting out of line. The message is so flirty and some of the message, Kibum dirty talked with Hyukjae. Like for example:

From; Kimkibum

Hyukkie, when will your husband come home tomorow? Let's go to my apartment and do naughty things, shall we? *grinned*

From; Kimkibum

Hyukkie, I love you so much, and I think I'm started to get addicted with your sexy fat plump lips.

Donghae was burned with jealousy, he saw his wife who was lying beside him sleeping peacefully. He started to fed up. He couldn't lie to himself and know clearly that his wife cheated on him.

And today, Donghae was arrive home and drink a cold water. His insides are freezing, but it's still not enough to soothe his broken heart. He decided to take a cold shower, hoping to ease his anger.

He heard sound of the door house opened, and he know it so well that it is Hyukjae, his wife, that earlier caught betraying him in the garden. He wear his shirt in fast motion, the cold water ease his heart, but when he heard that Hyukjae's back, he can't help but feel angry again.

"Ah, Hae. You are back from the office early?" Hyukjae asked with a stupid grin in his face. Donghae detest it, because the reason in that grin was not him. It's another person, Kim Kibum, his old crush. Donghae frown.

"Yeah, I'm back early." He said, Hyukjae then rush to him and hug him tightly.

"I miss you." He said and gave Donghae his gummy smile. Donghae hate himself because he still feel warm because of that gummy smile, despite the fact that his wife betrayed him.

"Where are you earlier?" Donghae asked him with a calm tone while shrugging Hyukjae's hand with a small force.

"Garden with Choco." Hyukjae said while tightened his hug, didn't wanna let go of Donghae.

"With Choco?" Donghae asked.

"Hmm" Hyukjae hump and nuzzled in his husband's chest. Donghae lost his calm and pushed Hyukjae till he lost his balance and eyeing Donghae confusely.

"Damn how can you give me that innocent smile while you are cheating on my back?!" Donghae shout while jabbing his forefinger in Hyukjae's chest.

"Huh?" Hyukjae acted like he is confuse and tilt his head.

"What are you s..s..saying Hae?" Hyukjae cursed himself stammering. And he chuckles awkwardly.

"Damn Hyukjae, you are with Kibum earlier!" Donghae yell. Hyukjae felt extremely scared, Donghae even called him Hyukjae, not Hyukkie. but he try his best to hide it.

"Hey.. Why are you Hae? Calm down, I'm just bumped to him when walking." Hyukjae chuckles awkwardly and grab Donghae's hand in his chest, he was scared, Donghae looks like he will slapped him in no time. Even Donghae never physically hurt him. Donghae glared at him and shrugged his hand harshly.

"Oh, you got no intension seeing him? Then how about yesterday you go to his house? You are bumping at his house?!" Donghae yell and took a deep breath. Hyukjae just watched him, fidgeting on his feet. He felt scared.

"You can no longer fool me Hyukjae, in this whole 6 months I hope, I even pray! I pray for you to stop!! And you don't. I even spoil you more! But still! You ignore me!" Donghae said sternly, Hyukjae gasped at his husband's statement. Donghae was not a religious person. But he pray. And yeah, recently Donghae spoiled him too much, make him think that he could do anything. Hyukjae feel really guilty.

"I..I'm s..sorry." Hyukjae said stammering, and he bite his lips, feels really guilty. Donghae scoffed

"Whatever." He said in a such obvious unhappy tone. Hyukjae surprised, Donghae never, not forgiving him when he said sorry. But not this time, Donghae even scoffed. There's one last Donghae's weakness, hug and kisses.

"Please." Hyukjae said pleadingly and hug his husband tightly. But Donghae didn't hug him back, then he kissed Donghae, but Donghae didn't respond to his kissed even he cover his lips to prevent Hyukjae's kiss with his palm.

"I don't know Hyuk, I don't know." Donghae took a wide step and went out from his house. Hyukjae left dumbfounded.

Hyukjae never think this could be happened. Hyukjae love Donghae so much, but in the same time, his old crush came to his life again. Bringing back old memories. Hyukjae know it is wrong, but still Kibum's so sweet. And his husband seems didn't know about anything. What should he do? He have just realised, he was cracking his marriage life. Hyukjae sat in the floor with his back on the wall. He felt really miserable. Then Choco jumped to his laps, licking his hand.

"Appa mad at Umma." He eyed Choco with a sad stares.

"What should Umma do?" Hyukjae asked his dog hopelessly.

Hyukjae stares hollowly to a random spot and his thoughts wandering around in his mind:

'I love Donghae, but I love Kibum.'

'Donghae.. Love me.. But is he now? God I felt really sad.'

'Kibum.. Love me too. I have to be happy. Donghae left me. I'm free.'

'But I feel pain here.' Hyukjae unconsciously clutch his clothes around his heart.

'If Kibum left me. I will definitely feel miserable too.' Hyukjae thought as if he wanted to cheer himself.

'If Kibum left.. And there's only Hae, will I feel this pain?' And tears unconsciously drop from his eyes.

"It hurts." He mumbled. Choco as if she is want to cheer him up, he licked Hyukjae's tears in his face.

"Choco, it hurts." Hyukjae smile bitterly while caressing Choco's fur.

'Donghae is my husband. Kibum is my first crush.' He thought again.

'Donghae.. Is the best thing happened in my life. So what is it Kibum?' Hyukjae thoughts getting complicated by the time, until he realized, after a long time.

'I love Donghae and I loved Kibum. It must not  messed up!' He realized and facepalm himself. How stupid he is.

He rushed to get his phone and pressed Donghae's number, but Donghae rejected it. He try several time, and yeah, Donghae ignore him.

So he dicided to send a message.

To; Donghae

Hae please, please, please forgive me! Please, I know I'm wrong. I'm sorry.

He re-read the message and sent it to his husband. But it's pending. Donghae must be really mad until he turned off his phone. Hyukjae hug his dog tightly.

"Choco, make your Appa forgive Umma okay?" He said bitterly and his dog just snuggle to his embrace more.


It's past midnight already but Donghae didn't go home yet. Hyukjae felt worried, because he know Donghae have no preparation when he left the house, all of Donghae's stuff still in the house! Hyukjae was sitting in the couch all day, stares hollowly to random spot, checked his phone everytime, and disappointed when he see Kibum's message instead of his husband. Anid he ignore Kibum too. He felt nothing as the misery struck him. He is numb, he felt nothing, he didn't even felt hungry even his stomach hurts so bad. But he ignore it. He felt like punishing his ownself. He wait for his husband until 3am, till his eyes refused to stay opened and sleep consume him. That night.. Hyukjae sleep at the couch.

In the morning, he wakes up when he felt sunshine stroke his eyes, he opened his eyes slowly and realized, there's no Hae, that night, his husband didn't go home. Hyukjae tried to call Donghae again, but Donghae ignore him. He sigh in frustration and decide to end his affairs with Kibum. It's not a right thing in the first place.

He phoned Kibum and they promised to met at Kibum's house. Hyukjae take a fast bath and grab his car key, so eager to go to Kibum's house.

But Hyukjae have no luck. At that time, Donghae wished to see his wife, he even thought of forgiving Hyukjae because he is in a misery too. And when he want to go to his house, he saw Hyukjae's car passing right in front of his car in a high speed, he couldn't take it and spying at his wife. Again. Luckily today he used Kyuhyun's car, his friend that let him to exchange their car everytime Donghae wants to spying on his wife, making him unrecognizable.

He was wondering why his wife so eager, he was speeding in the full speed.

Then he found Hyukjae goes to Kibum's house. Again. "So that's why you are so eager Hyukkie?" He mumbled with pain in his heart, he is forcing himself to watch what they are doing from afar.


Kibum went out of his house when he heard doorbells, he opened it and greet Hyukjae, hug him tightly and Hyukjae smile, giving him his best gummy smile that he love.

"Hey Kibum." Hyukjae called him.

"Hey gorgeous." Kibum wink at him and he chuckles. He pushed Hyukjae to go inside the house.

"No, I'll be quick." Hyukjae said.

"Donghae left me. He know about you." Hyukjae said bitterly.

"Then we can free playing Hyukkie!" Kibum smirk. That's Kibum, always think of playing, playing and playing. Maybe Hyukjae just love him because he felt fun.

"I think we should quit it Kibum. He is my husband. I'm his wife." Hyukjae said sternly.

"Then what am I?" Kibum faked a cry.

"Hyukkie I'm hurt." Kibum said and Hyukjae rolled his eyes.

"I'm sorry Kibum." He said sincerely. Kibum stop faking a cry and get a serious face.

"I love you too you know." Kibum said seriously.

"This is wrong. I loved you. I used to. But not now. I love Donghae, and I loved you, I kinda messed thing up." Hyukjae said.

"If I let you go, will you be happy?" Kibum asked Hyukjae.

"I don't know." Hyukjae shrugged his shoulders.

"I may not accept you when you are back." He said teasingly. Hyukjae hit his lap.

"I'm sorry." Hyukjae said.

"Yeah, I know this will be over, anyway. Thanks Hyukjae." He said and pulled Hyukjae on a hug. Hyukjae cried at his chest.

"I'm sorry." Hyukjae said while trembling.

"Sshhh.." Kibum soothe Hyukjae by patting his back. Then Hyukjae break off the hug.

"Bye Kibummie." Hyukjae smile.

"Good bye kiss?" Kibum asked and Hyukjae leaned his face, Kibum closed the gap between them and kissed Hyukjae for a long time, because it's their last.

Meanwhile, Donghae eyed them with a burning eyes, and he has no appetite to go home, he just going nowhere, speeding up with his car.


Hyukjae go home straightly, he is anxious, Was Donghae back home when he is not home? Hyukjae wondering in his house and found that Donghae hasn't come back, everything was on it's place. His stomach aching, he needs to eat, but everything seems tasteless, he didn't wanna even try. He yearns for Donghae. As if Donghae's his everything.

He curled in his bed while his both hands hugging himself, his stomach aching so bad. When will Donghae come back? He missed him, not to mention his heart is aching too. He started to cry. And he didn't wanna call Donghae, he know that Donghae will bursting and angry more.

After a while he endured the pain while crying because of his empty heart, he heard the door's opened, but he can't move, his stomach aching. But his heart beating so fast and he wipe his tears. He saw Donghae coming to the room. He gathered his energy and stand up. He rushed to hug Donghae. He was so happy that he didn't notice Donghae's frowning.

"Donghae sorry! I.. I miss you!" Hyukjae said and Donghae pushed him not so harshly, but because of his body not in a good condition, he fall in his butt.

"D..Dong..hae.. I..I'm sorry okay." Hyukjae said while crying. He was shocked with his husband rejection.

"Yeah, said the one who kissed with his boyfriend earlier." Donghae smirk evilly and Hyukjae gasped. Donghae know it all. Did he spying him?

"Donghae.. You.. You spied me?" Hyukjae asked.

"Just say it like that. But my suspicious proved. You are cheating!"

"D..Donghae.. It's.. It's a misunderstanding." Hyukjae said while still in his position, in the cold floor sit awkwardly. He eyeing Donghae, Donghae ignored him and walked to the wardrobe, taking his clothes.

"D..Donghae.. I.. I break up with him!" Hyukjae said pleadingly. "I'm sorry.. I'm sorry don't leave me! Please.." Hyukjae begged his husband who's still busy packing his things.

"Yeah. As if I can believe you!" Donghae stated angrily. "And I bet you'll be happy with Kibum." Donghae shouted, zipped his bags and rushed out, Hyukjae stood up instantly, enduring his aching stomach and hug his husband from the back tightly, preventing his husband for leaving the house.

"Please Donghae don't leave me. I.. I will be a loyal wife. Please give me a chance." Donghae's heart start to hurt, his wife that he loved begging him, and crying, wetting his shirt. But Donghae decided to shrugged it off and Hyukjae who have no longer energy, squat on the floor while clutching donghae's shirt's end.

"Please don't leave me. It's a goodbye kiss. I'm sorry please." Hyukjae pleads. Donghae caught his arm, his heart felt so hurt, even if he is angry, how could you react when the person you love pleads you while crying? He turned back, squat down till he saw his wife's face.

"Please I'm sorry. I'm confused.. I.. Loved him but I realized that I love you." Hyukjae said and tilt his head until he face Donghae. Donghae shocked when he looked at his wife's so-pale face. He is pale like a paper, and when he cupped his face, it's cold. There's no color in his face. It's only his eyes were red, instead of that, there's none!

"H..hyukjae are you sick?" He asked his wife, with fear. He is pale! And cold! Hyukjae shook his head.

"Please forgive me please. Please." Hyukjae said and he is change his position from squating to kneeling. With his both hands in his laps

"I'm sorry." He said

"I'm sorry for not being loyal." He said again.

"I'm sorry for hurting you."

"I'm sorry for messed up our marri-" Hyukjae's sentenced cut by Donghae, and he cupped Hyukjae's face again.

"Yes, yes I forgive you. Don't kneel anymore hyukkie." Donghae begin to feel so guilty, his wife's cold. Really cold. Hyukjae shook his head and still stubbornly kneel.

"I'm sorry." He said and cry hardly. Donghae hug him tight and feel the coldness from his wife's body.

"Hyukkie I forgive you. Hyukkie you are not okay!" Donghae said panicly.

"I'm okay. As long as you forgive me." He said tears still stream down his eyes uncontrollably.

"Hyukkie your body's cold! You are not okay!" Donghae yell. Hyukjae leaned to Donghae until Donghae sit in his place, no longer squating, and Hyukjae moved to his laps, clutching his neck like koala and cry in his chest. Donghae patted Hyukjae's back, feeling so guilty. Hyukjae is surely sick, he just doesn't tell why he is sick. And he is sure it's because of him, why he must burst out? Not just talk with his wife? Why he must angry and leave Hyukjae just like that?

"I love you Donghae." He said between his sobs.

"I know." Donghae said.

"And I won't betray you. I.. I'm confused. And I realize that I love you." Hyukjae said. Donghae pushed Hyukjae and shakes his shoulder.

"I understand and I'll give you a chance! I love you too! Now tell me! What do you feel you are pale and cold for God sakes!" Donghae eyeing him seriously, but Hyukjae just facing him and cry.

"When's the last time you eat?" Donghae asked Hyukjae.

"I.. I don't know." Hyukjae said. Donghae cursed under his breath. Hyukjae's body was easily sick. He can't skip any of his meals!

"How many meals do you skip?" Donghae asked him.

"I.. I don't know the last thing I ate is.. Yesterday's breakfast." Hyukjae said while eyeing Donghae.

"Why don't you eat?"

"I don't have any appetite." Hyukjae said. While lowering his head.

"God Hyukjae!" Donghae yell and Hyukjae cry again, Donghae called him 'Hyukjae again'.

"Shh.. I'm sorry I won't yell. I'm sorry. Sshh." Donghae patting his wife's back.

"Let me cook you something." Donghae stand up. But he notice that Hyukjae still there, he want to stand up, but he can't. His stomach really in a bad condition. Donghae shook his head and carry him like a princess to the dining's room chair. When Donghae wanna leave Hyukjae, Hyukjae clutched his clothes.

"Don't leave me." Hyukjae said pleadingly.

"I won't Hyukkie." Donghae smile. "I wanna cook for you."

Hyukjae waits impatiently, and he peeked several time, seeing his husband cooks for him makes him more guilty, Donghae is a good husband and he betrayed him. He cried again.

Donghae approach him with porridge in his hand, sat beside Hyukjae, take a spoonful of porridge and blow it.

"Aaaa-" Donghae motions Hyukjae to eat. Hyukjae eyeing Donghae and opened his mouth, wiping his tears. Donghae shoved the spoon to his mouth and he sigh.

"Don't cry. I won't remember it. Let's start over. I love you Hyukkie." He said and peck Hyukjae's forehead.

"I'm sorry." Hyukjae said.

"Yeah I know. And I won't remember it. Let's forget. You're regreting it right?" Donghae asked him and Hyukjae nod.

"Let's start over. Now eat." Donghae said and fed Hyukjae with full of love. Hyukjae can't help but still cry due to his guilt and Donghae wiped his tears with a lot of patience, after Hyukjae finished eating, Donghae lay Hyukjae in bed and Hyukjae hug him tightly scared that Donghae will left him. He patted his wife's hand and humming a song, to make his wife sleep.


OMG~ this is so sudden, Ideas popped in my mind even I know it's kinda weird, bear with me.
I supposed to write Fate 3. but yeah~I don't know. blame at HYUKJAE"S BLACK HAIR! he looks naughty :p

This is for comeback celebration! but sorry It's turns out angsty :'((
GOD see~ there's so many eunhae moments in From U
it's supposed to be an innocent dance, but Hyukjae  dance sensually, and yeah..
Why is the cameramen can't shoot in a good way.. ergh~ hate it.
OMG~ I'm going crazy I will spazz with no END!! THERE"S KANGIN!!
KANGIN's back!!

well~ please drop your comments. thanks :) 
love you all.

Tags: donghae, eunhae, eunhyuk, fic: regret, genre: angst, genre: drama, genre: romance, genre: slight!fluff, haehyuk, rating: pg-13

  • Fate 7

    Title: Fate Pairing(s): HaeHyuk (dominant hae submissive hyuk) Genre(s): Romance, Drama, Angst Rating: PG-13 may increase later. Length: Chaptered…

  • precious 2

    After the second crying incident in the grave, Donghae and Hyukjae pretty much closer. Because Donghae already know his address, Donghae often…

  • precious 1

    Donghae has already live in Mokpo for a month, and there's nobody that he found seems to be clicked with his criteria. Seriously, Donghae is a…

  • Post a new comment


    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

← Ctrl ← Alt
Ctrl → Alt →
← Ctrl ← Alt
Ctrl → Alt →

  • Fate 7

    Title: Fate Pairing(s): HaeHyuk (dominant hae submissive hyuk) Genre(s): Romance, Drama, Angst Rating: PG-13 may increase later. Length: Chaptered…

  • precious 2

    After the second crying incident in the grave, Donghae and Hyukjae pretty much closer. Because Donghae already know his address, Donghae often…

  • precious 1

    Donghae has already live in Mokpo for a month, and there's nobody that he found seems to be clicked with his criteria. Seriously, Donghae is a…